Destiny...

“Can Destiny Be Changed?”
“Does Destiny Exist?
"OR it’s Just a Word?"

Destiny believers speak that “Person is predefinely intended to something at some place on some time “. Something which is already written and you are merely experiencing it. The only difference is you never going to know what it is going to be. I say “Thank god - Future is unknown” :)

If written destiny exists, then what the life is for? Isn’t life stands for creation rather than just to experience? If future is all written as so called destiny, why do we act? why do we breathe? why do we try? why do we persist? why do we resist? why do we strive? why do we live – in single word ????????

God has provided us with something which is all ours - To create, understand and follow what we want to do about it – “A CHOICE”. Life is always beautiful, as we do not know the future. We never know what’s going to be part of coming tomorrows. It surprises us sometimes with lot of abnormality, mess and bounces and sometimes it keeps you boring as simple as it can. Still, I believe future of person depends on the choices he makes. Heard some day somewhere and I started believing it as so true it seems to be. I have always believed “Our Karma (actions) makes our destiny and it always have had created it since beginning”. There does not exist anything pre-written FATE. Every moment our actions are creating so called Luck or Destiny.


I read lot of responses from the web for my question – Can destiny be changed?

The best answer which keeps everyone in line was – “Even after you have changed your so called destiny - the destiny believers always say that, it is also destiny. Thus, if something happens, that is destiny and again, it is same destiny even if it does not happen. Now you can start pondering whether to believe destiny or not.”

To put it in example,
Well, if you want toast for your breakfast and go to the cupboard and find there is no bread, you could decide that it was your destiny not to have toast for your breakfast that day. If you pop out and buy dome bread and make some toast then did you change destiny? Or was your destiny to have toast anyway?
Destiny and fate is a romantic notion. If you believe in it, then no you cannot change it. It's often a way that we try to rationalize something, good or bad in our lives, that had loads of other factors not have fitted in the way they did, then that good or bad thing wouldn't have happened.

4 years back I read the novel called "The Alchemist" which had strong lines saying,
“The Biggest lie in the world is – At some point of life we lose the control of what is happening to us and our life gets controlled by FATE.”

Needless to say “The Alchemist” was internationally best seller novel. But a novel does not make a life of person rather Life allows person to make choices of creating novel. I am not sure what I read 4 years ago is true or not, but it feels always good to believe in it. Everything what occurs to us can be controlled by us and our series of actions, not FATE.

However, life keeps you twisting and turning with hurricane power over your beliefs when you vigorously think you have figured them out. Isn’t it? People say “God takes exams”:). When you strongly start believing and following something, God starts taking you on Roller costar ride to fight for your belief. Those who lose start believing in FATE and those who keep fighting keep going on.

Question is whose is True belief?

The one’s who never loses and keeps fighting?
Or
The one’s who lose had also the True belief and it’s just he could not fight against it?

Every day I encounter a word called LUCK in my life, which tries to keep proving it's existence. Instances keep on coming across to fulfill it. I am seeing the people who fell apart against destiny. I keep hearing repeatedly “Happens is for good always”. I see often people becoming practical and losing control over their path by changing themselves – that’s what they call it as “Learning of life”.

Honestly speaking, I don’t know where do I stand among all of them, but I keep resisting in believing so called pre-decided written destiny :)

May be “Not Believing in Destiny” is my Destiny – Isn’t it witty? :) :) :)

All is Well :-) :-) :-)

Remember Rancho saying “All Is Well” in 3 –idiots??

“All Is Well” artistically used as tiny relief provoker to the depressing, disturbed and itchy minds in the 3-idiots. At any catastrophic situation what we need is spark which can bloom the flame of upbeat to protect you from any devastation. Compare it with Big Bang which started from tiniest particle called proton and neutron ending up in creation of whole universe. This spark never unravel your predicament but releases energy to fight with them – and to best of the words it creates “All from Nothing” :-) Compare it with Sperm which gets released in millions of numbers but only single of them creates the Human by embodying with another single one. “All From Nothing” :-)

Candidly, “All Is Well” really mechanized to relax your calisthenics mind but for temporary and short term. The fact is All Is Never Well, but one always can make it well. Well word itself starts with ‘we’ depicting if “WE will”  it’s WE’LL -- > WELL :-)

Life never opens up with assurance of giving you best of it. At any point of it, problems are upstanding and without them life is not worthy. The only aspect which has to stand against it is – WE by all means of heart. Besides, everything happens for good and for reason including even those parts of life which we make it happen. Why to afraid of low situations when every problem has n+ 1 solution where n is number of solutions one normally tries and 1 is normally gets missed. One never needs to think why something didn’t work, rather should think of 1 reason why it will and it should work.

It’s all about responding to the life when it puts you in trouble. It’s about fighting. It’s about keep trying and enjoying. It‘s about feeling good out of worst situations. It’s about neither worry nor sorry to life. It’s about strong belief and following the belief strongly. It’s about not loosing your THRILL. It’s about good feel. It’s about It’s about believing in “ALL is WELL”.

It’s about 90:10 rule which says 90% problems are solvable if 10% of your reaction is perfect. It also utters 90% situations of life are not in under your control but 10% of your respond to the situation saves it.

Open heart. Hold it with hand. Tap up. Feel good. Enjoy moments. Cheer memories. Live the present. Hope for coming ups.

That’s called - All Is Well :)

10 . . .

Hope is life. Yes, hope is the driving force and it pushes the life forward and makes the life fruitful and worthiness for living. Positive thinking will enhance the life standards and reduces the stress levels. These following 10 points can help anyone to have a life with full of hope and positive thoughts.


1. Never get despair yourself for every simple defeat and take strong decision to work harder than the previous attempt.



2. Don't be always in a hurry mood, as hurry makes you worry. Have the patience and wait for some more time looking hopefully for the result. Certainly you will get the good result, as per the hard labor put by you.



3. Never show sympathy upon yourself. Instead you make yourself more capable and dependable.



4. Never allow anxiety to overtake you. Develop this type of thinking as, still what I have to do?



5. People around you, are needn't be either your supporters or opposites, your thinking must be in that manner. Moreover they are busy in their daily chores, that point you must ever keep in mind ever.



6. It is very difficult to please everyone always. The quotation is like this: "If you want to please all, you please none".



7. Never afraid of the changes that may occur in the circumstances where you are working but try adjust to them which gives relief from stress and strain.



8. Be of the opinion that you are helping others and not think like that others are utilizing you.



9. Never worry that you are in troubles and there is no way out. But remember the quotation: "Where there is will, there is a way". For every problem, there is a solution.



10. You have got your thinking capacity and you need not depend on others for simple things.




Finally,
Speak to others sincerely and live heart fully. Always laugh with others. Be friendly with others as much as possible. Be plain in your dealings. A sincere person is always liked by others, not serious.

I gonna keep trying ....

I can almost see it
That dream I am dreaming
But there's a voice inside my head saying
"You'll never reach it"

Every step I'm taking
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shaking

But I gotta keep trying
Gotta keep my head held high !

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be a uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb

The struggles I'm facing
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes might knock me down
But no, I'm not breaking

I may not know it
But these are the moments that

I'm gonna remember most, yeah
Just gotta keep going

And I, I got to be strong
Just keep pushing on

'Cause there's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be a uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb, yeah!

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Somebody's gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb, yeah!

Keep on moving, keep climbing
Keep the faith, baby
It's all about, it's all about the climb
Keep the faith, keep your faith..

NEVER QUIT.....

Honestly I have no idea where should I start with this blog? But still I’m confident that never ending lines I can write on these words - “NEVER QUIT” :)


3 Years Back, PUNE - 2008
I was in PUNE 3 years back when I was playing miserably terrible with my life having immature mind set. I won’t go in detail but I had been crazy for girl who probably never liked me just bcoz of immature deals I exhibited on times. I conferred with one of my school friends Vishant Shah which could’ve helped me in making it work. Vishant also known as Jack - was always genius and awfully positive man I have ever seen. He had key for every lock – solution for every problem; rather he also knew when to rupture the lock if keys doesn’t work anymore. He always used to say “Life is just a game of waiting for right moment to act”. There were lots of positive deals which could be learnt from him starting from Professional issues to Personal ones. But the only learning which set up unconditionally to my soul is “NEVER QUIT”.


Life is full of problems and without problems life is not beautiful. If u don’t know darkness of life you can’t realize the beauty of Brightness. There are always 2 choices for any critical situation in our life – 0 or 1. Well known binary form where 0 says Escape/Accept and 1 says Fight. Sometimes when you try to resolve problems it puts you in more troubles and you really don’t comprehend it. Sometimes you keep fighting for years and still you remain there only. Sometimes you loose more in fighting rather than you could have in accepting. But the day u accept/Escape – Fight is over and one more entry of Compromise in your life. I never say Compromises are not good, but one should always keep fighting for and as per his beliefs. Sometimes you may keep experiencing that it’s not working; However - The only Universal rule that must work was “NEVER QUIT”.

I am big fan of WWE championships on Ten Sports and I never miss JOHN CENA who is the most likable WWF champion so far - Loved by everyone. I have enjoyed lots of his fights and only thing I could grab is “He simply NEVER QUITs”. The one who NEVER QUIT – DOES WIN at last.

This also keeps me reminding the climax scene from Matrix – Revolution. Neo keeps getting up again and again even he’s brutally hit by Agent Smith. NEO simply NEVER QUITs for what he believes and what he choose :)

Bottom line is - I firmly believe “NEVER QUIT” :)

However this blog is also about other side of “NEVER QUIT”. Some days back I read GTALK status message on one of the most grown-up and brightest fellow of my college – Rushin Shah who’s amongst toppers of the Nirma University 2007. Status Message said “Try, Try and Try again – then quit. There’s no need to be damn fool about it.” I really wanted to talk on this with him for hours and I could have - but I can’t just push on my beliefs to others. I simply put his status message on corner of my mind for a while and continued with work that day.

The million dollars Question is – Was he right on his words? Can fools never win? Is it only madness to NOT QUIT?

The turning point of this Blog is – Vishant Shah himself. One, whom I believed and learnt from blindly, quit his battle last month. When I met him in PUNE, he was in strong relationship with her girl since 4 years. I met him after 3 years in his engagement but she was not THE ONE. When I asked him “Why??”, he said that he tried a lot but it didn’t work for inter cast marriage from her family. Family Emotions came in between too which ended up all the belief he was fighting for. I had very short discussion over this with my utmost disbelief cum shock of what he did and last I heard from him was “This is life”.

Still I believe teacher may get destroyed over time but teaching and learning never. I can’t quit my Belief and I won’t.

It's just I have question nurturing up in my mind - Does EMOTIONs really break our belief? Will it break mine? Is this life? :)

Warrior against Millions....

On small note but I found it most typical and funny way to get motivated….

2 days back I received SMS from a friend Nishit Zaveri on my cell...

"When you feel low, Depressed or useless...Always remember that you are the same sperm that won the battle against million others :D :D :D "

Isn’t it funny that we don’t realize how conqueror creature we already have been before we emerged out of nothing?

When nothing can create thing and thing defeats millions other things - how could you defeat yourself now when you are everything out of nothing that had created thing which already has defeated million things that could have been turned into million everything’s just like you? :) This fight you never knew when you fought as u were nothing, but fact is you did and won the race coming out as king of your own ….

Sometimes small messages leaves footprint in heart for years, directly touches the inner drive which channels up your positive thinking forever. Somehow this message did the same thing to me.

One way or another I feel when we ejaculate (loose) such million sperms and still feel the most satisfactory and magnificent moment being on 9th cloud, how you could feel depressed and useless on loosing something which hardly matters against value of single sperm.

Someone lost his wallet; he is sad…
Someone lost his car; he is gloomy…
Someone lost his job; he is terrible miserable…
Someone lost his girlfriend; he is discontented and cries for million times…

Now it's funny to accept the fact that girlfriend/boyfriend who ditched us, is just a 1 sperm which we ejaculate in count of millions, still feel like out of the world :) :D It’s just not up to girlfriend; it’s about everything else you ever had lost while fighting against or for it…

Value yourself because Fact remains same - I am the one who won against millions and you are also the same warrior since you were nothing… Additionally, biggest fact is - Now you are everything :)

I'm motivated.....Aren’t u?

Why so serious ??

Remember Joker saying “Why so serious?” in Dark Knight???

18th April, 2011,
Almost 6:00 in evening when sun is still about to set within hour rising down the level of evening humidity along with heat of April summer. Being on high-court Bridge, I could see a rough guy riding kinda racing bike over 80km/hour having Black spec ON. Within no time a car came from behind over 90+ speed on same track of the bridge. I couldn’t understand why horn didn’t reach to any of his ears blown by the car driver being in hurry. Car mostly tried to snatch the gap between bike and right end of the bridge. Being oblivious of car behind and deaf to horn, guy dint leave his track and in no time car gave left edge stroke to bike riding on 70+ speed resulting into lost balance and almost zero second to realize what happened abruptly out of air.

Bike along with guy scratched on the coarse road and guy never realized when bike was out of his reach. All he could see was bike grazing down with sparks on the ground and he himself was feeling harsh blows on right hand when he too was in same motion the bike was in. Both got stripped off in parallel for ~4-5 seconds and then bike was far away within next ~4 seconds. Guy tried to break himself getting thrown towards direction of front and without any common sense ventured his palms to stop himself. Before he could take his palms back another stripping blow on palms taking skin out of it. Finally he had to let happened what could have and dint make any try to save himself of injuries. In fact in the situation out of control, who can instantly apply logic when specifically guy hasn’t read best of “Accident se bachne ke 100 tarike”? ;) :D

~10 seconds and Game was over. Guy is ~20 Meter away gazing at what happened with almost consciously unconscious mind trying to recall what caused accident. Crowd came around and thought guy need 108 Ambulance. But……

With full Zeal guy stood up in not more than 15 seconds giving surprise look to the crowd.Man from crowd said “Either you are very fit or God is with you”.
He smiled and said “Both parts are true:)”. He looked back at Bike that is brutally broken and lying aside on bridge. Ohhhh my God – It’s GJ 1- LG 3426, my FZ-16. It took no time to realize I was really harshly pissed off right hand and both palms along with blow on back that already started acheing. This was my ~7th accident on FZ :). Funny part was – when I woke up and stare around I could easily see a board “Accident Prone Zone” ;) :D :D

I have seen several live accidents in front of my eyes but never had experienced. Of course it was dreadful on time but when knowing of being saved, it mounts best thank giving feeling towards GOD. I recalled when I was grazed on ground, one thought also had emerged saying “Am I gone today??? “ :). I don’t believe in luck but looking at what happened I don’t know what I should call it, as having no Helmet and getting knocked down on 80 Km/hr speed, still came out as no fractures, no head blow and being of no major vehicles around which again could have hit me out of anywhere. Then I thought if luck is there, why would I have hit this even? ;) :)

Answer lies in the most common mistake which normally this generation makes while driving. I must submit “Having Mega Bass effective ear phones on with Sony Ericson loudest music cell” was reason for harshly hurt hands and hoisted up ~3000 expense for bike repair. Miscellaneous lose would be my specs which was just bought from Mumbai trip. Overall I was digged into 5000+ debit from 007301546102 Account :).

Why?
Honestly speaking this blog is not about how brutally I was hit and how many days it took to recover my hands? It’s neither about suggesting all “Please drive carefully and don’t use earphones while driving”. It’s not at all about scaring others of driving on highway 80+. It’s also not about criticizing human monster that banged me down from behind and ran away w/o even single pinch on heart what could have happened after his knock. Neither have I wanted you to know how family reacts after such accident, nor friends :)

It’s all about how I took it. It’s all about experience. It’s all about “Bade bade desho me aisi chhoti chhoti baaten hoti raheti he” ;). It’s all about getting up and taking up. It’s about not getting scared of life. It’s about not loosing your Spark. It’s about being sincere but not serious at all (remember Chetan Bhagat?):).

My all friends in last few weeks advised me lots of bullshits. Some said why to go speedy – leave early if u want to reach on time? Some rumbled as u already had 6 accidents, still u dint change? Some called me and when I was laughing out of my situation, even they called me MAD. Some texted me “At least think about others if u don’t about yourself”. Some relatives and friends came home and keep insisting to take rest and never try to get back to work for some day (How ridiculous). Some also said I don’t know how to drive (Fuck off to them with Big man finger up :@). Some said “Take care” and some said “Hope your Dick is yet there” ;) :D :D

My sweet Mom of course is one of them who cried instantly seeing me the day I got handicapped for few weeks. She kept on saying again and again not to speed up bike for whole week as my time is no good as per Kundali. I had to lie how I met with accident for not to create scene that day. I recently came to know that she promised her god for 1 NAARIYAL for my quick recovery :) :)

A obvious Question is - What I wanted to hear? Why I don’t like the way my Mom had shown her love for his beloved son? (In fact Mom in the world is GOD itself) :). Why I am against the care and concerns shown by friends? Why I dint want to listen anyone? - After all they all want only good for me. So why?

Answer is – Spark of life. Why I should loose spark of life when something negative occurs to me? It’s not about CARE which I don’t like shown by them; it’s about words they use to show that care. It’s about making someone feel that he is really really met with a painful accident. I met with an accident once and they all made me feel again and again everyday :( :( :( Wasn’t it demotivating? Why should I be scared of life? Why should I not try to get back to life?

All I wanted to hear was: “jESS, u’ll get well soon. Then again be ready. Your FZ is waiting for you :)” Why dint anyone said “I think you can work from tomorrow”? Why dint anyone said “It’s okay jESS, hota he. Life is no good without accidents”? Why dint anyone said “you look fit yar, lets go for cricket”?? Why dint anyone said “Lets have Bear for accident party”?? :) Why din’t anyone said “Why so serious.....hmmm” ???

Care is all good until it demotivates you :)

I normally see when child collapses while trying to walk and starts crying, every parent picks him up and consoles him. But- why not to let him cry? All you want is –him to laugh every time? Why not to allow negative experience of life? When he will learn of getting back from dark side of life himself?

DPS School , 11:30 PM, Last week
Recently I went to National level Skating night tournament at DPS School where 5 to 15 years children had taken part. I truly overjoyed 2-3 skating races. Afterwards, girls group ageing 8 years came for skating. During skating one girl lost her balance and fell down almost on good enough speed. She started crying instantly and never got back to race. I shouted “Come on Get back to race…Go on…you can….” even I dint know her but she hardly could listen me among other people along with her parents who just stopped her right there. It was most Pathetic I heard from them :@. Honestly for me - it ends up in outrageous fury feel when someone doesn’t get up after falling down and quits race. Life is not at all about Quitting race, it’s about keeping it continue in any situation without loosing spark :) It’s about trying to bounce back with same zeal after hitting hard at bottom. Why should we change ourselves when something negative occurs to us? It’s not about rejecting the lesson of life, but it’s also about living the life :).

Well for an update, All I am is good with major dressings stripped off :), and already Started playing cricket and riding bike again long back even though recovery will take 10 days more. Its just I can’t loose spark of life in waiting. Of course I have my lesson after my accident but it’s not about quitting my bike or my speed, it’s only about quitting earphones while driving :) In other words, It's just my being sincere rather than serious... Bcoz - All I believe is “Why so serious....?”

It’s started ….

The bell is about to ring and the moment being waited for one year is about to embark within 10 minutes plus or minus 30 seconds. There can’t be, overriding the utmost freedom my childish mind gonna embrace with all wishes visually coming true in front of eyes which in-fact are no wishes; they are simply highly reverberated desires. One can undoubtly compare this feeling with little kid getting offered his favorite chocolate and it’s just a one hand away :)

The most wonder part of the instance was having knowing no meaning of planning. Bet me on that – things really works at peak pleasurable altitude when u r unplanned for something and ready to cuddle on whatever approaches your way drastically. Try it !! What the fuck is planning and why I need it? I really don’t know what I gonna do about it; still I’m waiting and indulging every passing moment glancing at my 90+/100 answer sheet. I already know that I gonna be among top three of the class this year too, still keep flipping the pages with no reasons putting my mind aside for desires I just mentioned about. May be trying to get it over and showing off to teacher that I still am brightest student who concerns for his last paper the way he does for his first ;) :D Honestly speaking – I din’t care ;)

Countdown starts - 10….9….8….7….6.…5….4….3….2….1….0…Bell rings !!
Wooooooooo……. Yahooooooooo…..yeeeeeeeeeeeee :D :D :D

THE SUMMER VACATION :) :) :)
Bell Rang and I jumped right at once knowing unknowing ecstasy that was bouncing in my heart since one year. A sildenafil integrated sex with the hottest girl having firm bosoms and bouncy butt also can’t provide the pleasure which I had having at that moment. It’s sensation that was Incomparable, Unimaginable and Unforgettable, called as FREEDOM :)

I never learnt waving final hands to all friends. I never had girls as friends; so no promises and fucked the care what other boys gonna do about holidays. I bothered for only one obvious part at that moment – THE CRICKET :)

Month of April , 2:00 o’clock Noon
It was April end sun which kicked off showing his extremeness at 2:00 in noon. But I already had declared “Sorry dude, it’s my time now” ;). I of course dint care to leave for home and was waiting for other school mates to draw gather soon on Rupal Park ground right in-front of my school. I recall few names Hiren, Gatti, Laali, Dilesh, Patel, Chirag, Hemal, Ankit , Babu, and some others. All mad about cricket and what I mad about was FREEDOM :)

2:00 PM to 4:00 PM – first match
Candidly speaking, I dint have proper shoes too on that time :( I used to wear slippers mostly. Never cared for sun screen lotions, no hand gloves, no cap/hat and also no protection of self using hankie on face even. Did I know the meaning of sun glasses? :( I was all open, definitely not fighting with sun; but at truth – I dint care about sun and what damn he can give :P Additionally, those days, I mostly had to be part of fielding only as Gatti, Hiren, Babu and Laali were the prominent cricketers; but the one who never complained was little jESS. That said just run in and out of ground behind the ball for 2 hours under so called unbearable sun and get nothing which hardly one can believe was FUN :). Being substitute on other fielders already had become habit and habit on this age normally rules over you :) Hence – double side fielding :( :( :(

Though, worth feeling was sweating just like getting drenched in monsoon. In-fact the fact is – Only initial part is irritating when you are sweating under 40+ degree; but once you are drenched all over, you actually start enjoying every drop of it on your smelling body. When sweating drops pass by your body, it’s magical sensation that makes you feel alive. I actually used to think them as DEAD who are shut down under Air-Conditioner at home watching TVs or sleeping after huge meal and never bothered to know what it is like to be under nature’s excruciating power. If you haven’t experienced the extreme, what life is worth for ??? Needless to say, freedom and cricket did cost my lunch too :(

However, I minded for nothing but Pepsi cola worth 1 Rs. Remember different flavored ICE COLA – Orange, Kala Katta, Mango, Khus, Rose, Milky ones??? They were no lesser than Divine source of energy those days. All fielding was worth if I had single ORANGE or KALA KATTA flavoring ICE cola(Pepsi Cola) after 2 hours of extremeness. I wouldn’t point out much about enjoyment in sucking favorite flavored ICE as it may raise other questions at this age ;) :D But I really miss PEPSI COLA :)

My words call it “Extreme Enjoyment at Extreme” – when your Slippers goes tattered and you have no other choice than walking bare foots :( I much alike remember walking bare foot having broken up slippers and every 50 steps, I went under nearest tree to make my feet relaxed. I won’t feel bashful telling the truth that I also some day walked on cow shit to feel the wetness for bare foots strolled down more than half kilometer on 40+ degree roads:) It really felt Awesome…. My teachers were proved right saying “Cow is our mother” ;) most useful and worth worshipped animal to Hindus :)

4:00 PM to 7:30 PM
4:00 to 5:00 was go home just to say Hi to mom, have some snake and revisit again for 5:00 to 7:30 cricket with Baka Kaka. Baka Kaka one of the best human being I’ve ever met, well known for crafting hard working people/cricketers all over Vijay Nagar who’s playing Cricket at his 60s but his enthusiasm still no lesser than 30 years . 5:00 PM to 5:30 PM – before starting cricket he used to made us run 2 circle rounds of ground followed by Catch practice and fielding practice – pointless to say under intense sun which is still to take 2:30 hours for setting off :( It’s really hard to bowl 60 balls continuously with run up of minimum ~20 steps in practice with Baka Kaka who does not count Spinners in his Evening CC team :) More than 35 players ageing from 10 to 60 years, to play for 2:30 hours and that too with the fanaticism and zeal one may have hardly ever witnessed. Honestly- after these 2-30 hours game i always was in situation to sleep in ground itself. These 2-30 hours have been most universally spent time of my whole life started from 5th standard every evening. I knew nothing about cricket and now I am proud to be handpicked cricketer of Vijaynagar team. All credit goes to – BAKA KAKA bringing me up and letting me know the meaning of Hard-work at every step of my life started from 5th of schooling :)

7:30 PM Onwards
Post Evening plans normally were to stray around for long walk with Hemal (my besty once upon time), hanging in garden playing Badminton, Catch me if you can, Lock and Key or Maar Dadi(my another favorite) with mates, enjoying ICE-GOLA with different flavors named Chicku, Chocolate, Rabdi, Orange, Anjir, Mava Malai and many more worth ~5 rupees each against Ice cream that may worth 15+ rupees. I hardly know if I knew when I had to revert myself back home once I’m outta there. Biggest thank to god for such indefinite FREEDOM :) Sleeping time was no concern as it used to be on terrace. Late night chatting with friends was habituated. Apex Flats crowd was well set for playing cards, Carroms and Hide and sheek(game called as Stop) till late night. Krutarth(10th failed now a days) was friend with whom I used to roam walking late 3:00AM after dropping Hemal at his place and stealing Milk bags from Janata Dairy where canes were shipped outside late around 2:30 AM. Coming back home with 5-6 Milk bags(Amul Shakti, Amul Gold, Best Milk etc. whichever possibly could be picked) of 500 ml each, total worth ~50Rs and sharing all with street puppies we had at my place. This was definitely craziest part but I hardly have anything acted upon which can not be counted as crazy, have I? :) I don’t remember when I used to sleep everyday in summer vacation :)

Next Day, Morning ~7:00 AM
Again, next day match is already set from 7:00 AM to 9:30 AM and 10:00 to 12:00 :))

12:00 to 1:00 go for Shaktimaan watch if saturday else my favorite KHANA KHAJANA with sanjeev kapoor along with little lunch, come back for another match or gather just to play friendly cricket under same agonizing and excruciating sun of April-May summer. Evening again with Baka Kaka till ~7:30 and then night roaming again and again :)
This schedule used to continue until all other school mates and flat mates are gone for vacation on their relatives or out of station. I never did. When they all were away, passing whole noon on Mario/Contra or Cricket at my place can be called as Gali Cricket with Jigar, Pratik and Paaras was mostly the spending time activities. Sometimes Marbles for whole noon with brother, Jigar and Paaras; sometimes whole noon in garden with Ravi and Mayur; Sometimes under banyan trees swinging myself with Akshay, Amit and other kids; sometimes playing Amli Pipli; Sometimes dangling using cycle TYRE made swing under tree; sometime playing with GILLOL and attesting our expertise on birds (why do I feel bad about it now?? :(); Sometimes….sometimes….at some times :)

April 2011, Ahmedabad
It’s started summer in Ahmedabad; but now why I’m changed chap? Why do I care more about myself rather than FREEDOM? Why I afraid to go out without sun screen lotions? Why do I need cold drink worth more than 20Rs when I’m outta home after even 10:00 in morning? Why do I cover myself from all side? Why do I have branded shoes, sun glass and cap on, still concerned about reaching home ASAP on my FZ? Why I’m afraid of nature as if it will knock me down? Why does it feel terrible when office A.C. is not working? Why I lost my mind if electricity is intercepted even for 30 mins? Why I need water every hour that too only chill? Why I am not the way I was????? Why ?????????????????? :) :) :)

Honestly - I want to be little jESS again :)

Extra-Marital affairs ???

Ever thought about what it means to be the other man in a woman's life?

There is always one woman you can't help but notice :) So does occur to me also times on times. Being honest, married woman is easier to fall in lust with; hardly THE ONE can fall in love. It's that Devil we're talking about, who paves his way into the heart of HOT married woman one cannot resist. Even if the reason why men are so attracted by her could just be lust, Men prefer guising that lust under the garb of the 'Other man to that woman' being the Home wrecker. I don’t blame men for pointing their finger on her. It's all thanks to the society's stereotypical thought ;) :)

Factually I believe - There is nothing wrong or hurtful being attracted to a married Woman; then again, if you are pondering being the “Other Man” in her life, may be below pointers should be interview questions for you.

What you need out of life?
I kept thinking, Does it really worth the word Commitment in relationship? I always have heard from diligent sources “For women, commitment and security in a relationship is extremely necessary”. Next question to me was “Are men (like me) really ok with the short-term pleasure they receive? Why are they not willing to settle for something better? Do they Fear?

Answer was Love. Love what you do and do what you love. Fear never lets you free but Love always does :) This may/may not be false statement – but Love is the final destination.

Believe me!!

What are goals of your relationship with that Woman?
What I think is – now days who care about goals when it comes to relationship. Just make it and break it once you crack it ;). In-fact have heard lots of time from friends – “Goal should be our interest getting satisfied :)”. May look like blunt statement but it’s nothing but true.

You should question yourself about things like why is it that you are compromising and willing to be the second fiddle to a married woman's husband. Are you so die-hard of attention? At times, you just might be high on confidence and self-esteem, with a million women wanting to be with you, but you still lay your hands on that married woman. Is it just a way to show that you are the ultimate seductor who can woo any woman regardless of his relationship status?

Check out!!

Are you in the husband's shoes?
Being honest, when I had married woman who could have been my girlfriend had I wanted, I never cared for this question. Neither the other men does. In-fact feeling free out of responsible relationship is men’s first priority; so was mine as I’m unmarried.

Think once, will it be ok for you to see your wife having an extra marital affair? You might just be able to figure how heart-wrecking such a situation can be. It is important for you to remember that everything she told you about why she is in a relationship with you, might just not be true. You might be missing out his husband's stand.

Think about it!!

Do you weigh the consequences?
This has been always biggest culprit of my life working on things without looking at clear road way. I hardly look for the prospect which could be easily observed. I just do it and never cared for it. It’s not just about relationship; it’s also about other aspects of life. But today somehow I can also win over it at least when it comes on relationship.

Measure the short term and long term consequences. You do not want to realize five years later that you should not have wasted the prime of your youth on her instead of looking for other, better options. It is important to ask the woman you love whether she is willing to stand up for you. See if she is woman enough to protect you when you are being judged by others. Does she ever stand up for you and take the onus of being linked with you? If the answer to all these questions are no, she's treating you as that snack you would like to munch on once in a while but never have for a daily meal. He he he ;) :D

I’m going correct. Ain’t i?

Are you ready to be tagged as the home-breaker?
It really sucks!! – when I think about being called as Home-wrecker.

Think of how people will be wary of you, keeping their wives away from you including your friends. Woman will never share the blame with you. However, you will be held responsible for being the man who breaks his house, despite whether you entered in the relationship while she already had a bad marriage or not. It's important that you are secure in your head that you never intended to break her marriage; your intention was only Love.

Got it? !!

Are u little over-possessive about your women, be it their wife or their girlfriend?
I’ve felt it times on times being possessive about my girl. Could u imagine how it would feel when being over-possessive makes it departure and she leaves you? It took months to recover myself. How much you would take?

Fact is - Men want the best of both worlds. Bear the difficulties that may ensue if at all you leave the relationship. Remind yourself that you knew she was married and you had to make compromises. You just might be heart-broken without her, but trust us it will be worth it.

Accept the Fact and challenge yourself. Can ya?

Couldn’t you find someone who would give you first preference?
Had always want to be most preferred friend in my circle; so did I want with my previous affairs. First preference equals stable relationship. If I don’t have stable relationship today, it simply means I was never first preference for girls I’ve been with so far. Unfortunately – This is also bitter truth of my life :)

I must say - If you are the one who is ready to pull out a tissue from your purse on the death of an ant, then probably it is best for you to move on and find a companion for yourself, who will give you what you want. Truthfully, if you're looking for a stable relationship, this is not the one. Being in a relationship with a married woman is like walking into a furniture store and asking for clothes :)

Any comments?

Foot prints …

Habitually since 2 years - blotting footprints has become my hobby whenever I stride novel step in any journey. I hardly fail to spot possibility of striking “jESS - Power”on people around some or another way. In-fact, it gradually has been practice to get called up by the people whom I may not identify even. Such affairs started from family functions; whereby a Girl approaches and initiates discussion with me; however I’m unacquainted of responding as of having no idea who that feminine individual is. I’m uncertain on “it’s Good or Bad” of not being discern about relatives of my family – but I feel good despite their being knowing me well ;) :D I am bit swollen with pride – ain’t i?
4th February, 2011
Fervently waiting for the day ever since the day I joined PCS is awaited for 1 day now, followed 1 month. Once again I gotta do it and I’ll be dancing on 9th cloud of PCS especially on Metlife Project Floor – s3 wing. 5th February is The Judgement day. Being pretty confident that I wouldn’t sleep much tonight and would wake up hastily at ~5:00 AM even if after AKSHAR MEDICAL schedule gonna sleep around 1:00 AM post having had updated Facebook, I was ready to dream and live it again. I definitely gonna get it – if I can’t, I’m not jESS 

5:00 AM, 5th February, 2011
“Tick Tick” did not jingled this aloud since long time; street dog’s cry and bark which never had I cared while sleeping and today I could hear so resonantly. Who cared ever when early morning Mom worship for dearest goddess of her? But, today Wind also blew like never before giving zizing sound in ears waking me up with all efforts it could - to achieve the dream I dreamt of month ago. 4:40 AM - I tried to envelop my ears with Pillow not trying to hear anything which wasn’t usual but the fact was – I was unusual, not single living or dead object around me 

With no arguments to my sleep, I flung blanket aside and opened eyes to greet premium day of my life. Thought for Jog of 1-2 KM and had my “Monza” branded sport shoes on. I walked out leaving my mom stunned behind thinking what’s in his mind today? – I was sure that I‘ll have answer for her after 6-7 hours. I started strolling with heavy feet to unveil jammed feel of 4 hours. 50 meters walk on 132 feet ring road and pace increased. Without prompt I started running and stopped after around 3 KMs heaved with high breaths not intended for morning jog rather were just to feel first spark of the glorious day. I looked at sky if GOD could spot me as a Meta molecular part of the world in “Ready to fly away darkness” and bless me 
Saturday was fasting; how would I get strength to accomplish my dream? - But I more needed was Positive energy which indefinitely had started brimming. After morning feel of spark, didn’t have time for shower; hence did brushing and face wash; had morning milk which is going to survive me for the next 5 hours during battle of the day. I AM READY!!
Previous Day,
“Have u been to Nehrunagar cross roads?” asked PV.
“Yes. Who doesn’t know Nehrunagar Gathiya Rath?” I retorted.
“Royal Enfield Show room?”-
“Yes… ~100 meters from Nehrunagar Gathiya Rath.”
“Next gate to Royal Enfield show room – is of my society. Give me call once you reach there.”
“Will do. Tomorrow morning at what time we gonna leave?”
“6:15 AM sharp, we both will depart as we need to pick up Keyur and Hardik from Maninagar”
“I will be there at 6:00 sharp” – last “Feel certain” statement I uttered to Pranav aka PV.

Reaching 6:00 in morning at Pranav’s place was target and it was 5:50 when I kicked off FZ-16. 10 minutes are good enough and I fired off on 60+ speed from Ring road to Shivranjani to Nehrunagar. Before I could call him once reached, got call from Pranav to come down straight IN and find WAGON-R with head lights ON. I spotted it along with 34-38-36 figured Pranav and parked my FZ on his bungalow. Within 15 minutes, after picking up other 2 guys, we were on the way to highway heading Gandhinagar…..

7:00 AM, 5th February, 2011
With first glimpse of sunrise - two teams are geared up, passionately practicing for Batting, Bowling and fielding to show their utmost talent in PPL (Patni Premiere League) cricket tournament. I practiced for only3 bowling deliveries and then moved my focus on stretching up. Having Exhibited “J” power to the team within 3 Deliveries, Keyur(The captain) much assured himself about my position in bowling line up. To scrutinize the team strength depending on which I gonna set my goals on Bowling /Batting. I kept watching all while practice. Unfortunately – there was none other than Keyur whom I can rely on during 14 overs. I have to win battle myself as One Man Army – I confirmed my thought!!

7:30 AM, Sarkari College Ground, Gandhinagar
Amid coin brattling up in the Air, Keyur blurted out “HEAD” and “TAIL” it was. Opponents decided to Bat first as they’d defeated their opponents in previous match restricting them away for 18 runs after setting target of 86. All our weak point was fielding positions for 6/11 players who were awesomely playing with ball after dropping the catch. 3 out of them were about 90 Kg including PV regarded as good batsman. Anand and Keyur were to open bowling spell. I’d played with Aanand 5-6 years back; and after his first over I was crystal-clear that he’s still playing 6 year old cricket. Keyur whom I counted as good bowler wasn’t much impressive; but unquestionably better than Anand. They bowled first 4 overs and Opponent team scored 28 without loss. 1 catch drop involved in 28 runs – Big thanks to Zazzing fielders of my Team :)

Keyur handed me ball for the 5th over and I had to have good line-length before I move to increase pace. First 2 balls were trouble-free keeping accurate line of the bowling. Then I had to switch my button ON. I looked at the SUN and took my 30 step run up keeping semi twisted grip using top of index finger and Bigman, loosing the heaviness of the ball – such delivery I normally use to surprise the batsman with my actual pace and when about to release the ball taking higher jump than my normal Delivery jump at bowling crease which consequently gives extra height a ball needs, in Nano of Nano seconds thought said – Good Length instead of Yorker which I decided before taking run up and pitched up ball 6-8 meters from batsman outside stump line intently giving rise to the ball to let him play the square cut which of batsman being unaware with pace and height of the ball compared to previous deliveries, tried to hit and ball taking edge of the bat went in Keeper’s hand. Pranav didn’t make any mistake and it went for first dismissal of the Opponent team. First ever wicket of Patni Premiere League by jESS. jESS catched up with the momentum and all my team gave me pat on my back including hug from Captain himself. But there’s still long way to go...

I gave them break through and next batsman was finest batsman of the team as said by Keyur before I was to bowl him. 4th ball of my first over and the finest bat of opponent team standing on the front end. I needed to watch him playing 2-3 balls before I can hunt him as well. I although, tried to bang on him right on his first delivery. Dynamic change occurred in last delivery was replacement for Yorker – “but this time I gonna bowl Yorker”– I said to myself. The way to play Yorker gives idea on talent of the batsman. Same run up, same pace for running, same gripping and same jump for taking height – but this time angle and time to release the ball was different giving slightest early release to the ball changing direction and keeping eye on stump visible through bat and the leg of the batsman – I gave it extra pace and shoot the ball like rocket giving jerk to the ball from wrist. But…………….

The finest player of the opponent team was truly graceful with the bat as the way he flicked taking two parallel legs slight back on time giving ball to pitch at Yorker length and directed bottom face of the bat toward leg field giving him 1st run of his diligent start of inning. With his first run, I was confirmed about his efficiency on batting and how easily he can put marks on his scoreboard. Nonetheless I did concentrate on supplementary side of the batsman. I gave dotted ball which was 5th of my over and then had to bowl last one of first one. “In-swing is a good option” I thought as this player was playing straight bat.

6th Ball of my first over- Gripping had to be modified allowing space between index finger and Big-man, taking thumb little bit inside on bottom of the ball, seizing pace and while jump giving tight fingering on the ball ejaculating with perfect in-swinging angles between all the fingers and playing smart roll over on the ball by fingers before release giving inwards drift to the ball. Speed, Length and Swing at a time – With my judgement player went for open face outside Off and Middle stump with straight bat and ball came IN missing the bat of the player after pitching, hit the Middle-Leg stump. Woooooooooooooooooo !!

2nd wicket of the first over. I did it. I gave the team another break through. First over of my Patni career and 2 wickets with 3 runs. Excellent start in winning confidence over the team!! All were then with zeal to enjoy the next show keeping high hopes on me restricting the opponent team within easily chase-able score.
Keyur gave me slap on bum saying – excellent over Man!!
As said, the finest batsman of the opponent team was playing smart game keeping rotating strike rates and never playing intently risky shots when his team was under pressure after 8 overs 40 Runs for 5 wickets among which I took 3 wickets in 2 overs and other 2 were run outs. He reserved his strike most of the overs as non-strikers were getting low with the runs and wickets were dropping off at regular interval. I won’t mention much about the catch drops in my overs which could’ve rendered me 5 wicket hall. Nonetheless in 4 Overs I gave only 13 runs snatching 3 wickets. The only one batsman of opponent team could give the fight and took his team up to 65 in 14 overs. Decent Batting- I must say!!

Chasing 65 runs: Royal Challengers
“65" is Chase-able score in 14 over – said Keyur sending me and PV to open the bat.

I had no idea on PV’s game, but I had to keep my usual game on. Focus was only to make my team win and grab the Man of the Match award scoring highest runs. I took the strike – I always compare my play with Adam Gilchrist’s and always try to play like him; He’s my ultimate ideal for cricket. He’s more than tremendous and magnificent player for me after watching him million times hitting incredibly and being the most dangerous player of the 2003-2007. Gilchrist, Sachin Tendulkar, Brian Lara and Kumar sangakara are well known for their sportsman spirit also. Those who’ve seen world cup final of 2007 knows the supremacy of Adam Gilchrist very well. In-fact IPL-2 is the best example of One Man Army – The Gilchrist. There are many records scoring fastest century in IPL, fastest century in Test cricket ever, fastest century in World cup finals etc. He is/has been simply Awesome to watch!!

In-fact I’ve learnt to play directive shots after watching him over & over times. How not to loose your momentum and never put yourself under pressure giving natural game in all situations; how to strike hard when once you start middling it on the bat; how to twist the hook and pull shots; how to take advantage of inner circles ; how to understand the reach of good length balls etc.

I played simply excellent start inning, never worrying about who’s bowling against me. In-fact in first 4 over, score was 34 with loss of one wicket of PV; out of 34, I scored 20+ including 3 boundaries. I never rested myself and kept scoring targeting final destination. Unfortunately a mistaken call resulted me “Run-out” when I had 28 Runs in my plate. Though, team needed only 10 runs to win in 6 overs when I was out of the ground. My team standing and clapping for me when I came out concluding winning total of the team. If I recall commentary words: “Jasmin – who’s well known as jESS amazingly scored 28 runs in 20 balls only, giving first drift path of victory to his team. Excellent bat found in Royal Challangers….”
Needless to say - We won the game soon afterwards.

Awaited Moment kissed me
The proudest moment I had waited for since a month finally is “15 minutes away”. A south Indian though beautiful girl gave me hand shake asking my name & spurring on “Brilliant performance”. The cricket council of Patni (I don’t remember his name- but I’m hopeful he does mine) awarded me Man of the Match award. A small photo session where I am center of attraction seizing MOM award in hand. My team is yelling aloud for me and I have immense pleasure of making my mark among all the players standing on ground. Simply fabulous feel!!

Butterfly Effect of MOM award
All started taking my bat in hand and flattering about it even though they know zilch about Balance of the bat; gripping of the bat and height/face/bottom of the my bat ;) :D Almost all players of the team asked me for contact number and then we set off for party. I was asked for best of my choice to order in party, pampering me like a kid. They all know me by my name but honestly I know names of only 2-3 players of the team at this moment too 

Next day was the second match and PV said – From where I need to pick you up tomorrow? :D :D :D Can ya see the change?

All on Metlife floor knows me by Name – gives me hand shake in morning when I reach office. Some also calls me CHAMP and it simply feels out of the world. I think I stamped my FOOTPRINTS on all people’s heart around….isnt it?

Dare to Dream ...

5th FEBRUARY, 2011
Codeine phosphate, Chlorpheniramine Maleate, carmoisine and FCF compose up Corex Cough syrup which is Anti-allergic, Anti-tussive and dry cough reliever. Levo-cetrizine is for allergic throat and nose rather Levofloxacin is one step higher content used as antibiotics which is too inferior than Azithromycin. Even children discern about Paracetamol but Diclofenac sodium is vastly effectual as pain reliever. Omeprazol, Ranitidine, Rabeprazol are acidity curers. Serratiopeptidase for controlling swelling after Gynac and endoscopic surgery where again Clid –VL, Candid CL and Onabet V1 that contains Sertaconazole nitrate are for vaginal infection. One of my best learning – Levonorgestrel which is contraceptive well known as I-Pill or Unwanted-72 in market and Sildenafil Citrate is an oral therapy for erectile dysfunction – A prominent name is Viagra ;) :D.

7 YEARS AGO,
12th science stream and Mom-Dad never had strained me toward schoolwork ever past 12 years from Junior K.G. to 11th (standard science stream), making me self-assured that they’ll never raise concerns over 12th furthermore even if it was central board year that would hoist up line of business for me. Neither they ever asked pertaining to my subjects nor had I ever to give details. Not confident - I ought to seize proud out of it or not, but in my 12 steps of edification so far, I never acquire educational help from Mom-Dad. It slipped through out my way and turn out as luminous part on each career steps. The fact is – My Mom and Dad are low with education but infinitely high with family cultures, social manners, immeasurable religious touch and incomparable love for us. There’re endless precious words for writing about my Mom-Dad nurturing me up out of excruciating conditions, and I’ll definitely grab that honor some other day :)

They never were able to distinguish between Chemistry and physics, all they knew was – “Their son is learning and he’ll make his way surely”. Neighbors’ve told times on times – “jESS, you will become doctor one day and your brother will be compounder (as he was low with study) and I used to LOL :D :D :D ”. I used to feel on 9th cloud when school teachers and mates uttered akin words – “jESS, you can crack Doctorine“. In-fact it’s been golden era of my schooling life when being topper of the class, girls/boys used to be around for solving Maths and physics :) I was/am born sporty and particularly cricket has always planted seeds of attraction, fame and proud in spectators’ hearts. Needless to say - I was CHAMPION from all perspectives during schooling :)

APRIL - MAY, 2003
“Life screws you right when you think you’ve figure it out” (Remember five points someone?). My over-confidence and extra affection on girl (Mera pahela pahela pyaar ;) :D) ended me up in low grading out of what others had highly anticipated – I let them down. People consoled me saying -“Result of the 2003 was Low” but what I truly believed was - I let them all down. All words which used to make me feel my supremacy - were subsequently just bitter past joke which I can’t even laugh on having tears in eyes :) I barely was able to make eye contact with people around for some days who’d high hopes & expectancy on me. Mom as always supported from all side but - Was I deserving that? jESS got the utmost freedom in his life whose Mom-Dad never let occurred single word when putting book aside he used to talk for hours on Landline with reason of this day. I never’d been mature for love and juvenile attraction prepared tough rather impossible highway towards my DREAM which were more precisely other’s DREAM :)

2 MONTHS LATER
“Life always makes a way, the way water makes it in hills”. Two months later I’m nonetheless part of Nirma University learning computer science which in-fact I’d started as miserable student lowering standard of study that was offered and getting low grades in initial three semesters. A person, who knew zilch of switching on/off the computer, was by then struggling with C & C++. Someday a student used to be acme of the classroom and now he’s meager fellow among the brightest talents from different metropolitans across. Honestly speaking, I sensed the way never before while getting myself insulted in classroom by our faculties. Reason I put forward was “The girl of my life” but factual reason was “jESS – The loser”. One can defeat any depriving circumstances but I could not- in-fact I was not “THE ONE” :(

4th SEMESTER, NIT, 2005
As I said “One can defeat any depriving circumstances” and it begun taking place right from 4th semester once I lost my job in cyber café which again had I been doing to cure undoable choice of my life opting “Splendor +” instead of “Intel motherboard with Desktop and operating devices”, which when running out of money for releasing carbon out of 1.5 feet long silencer converted from 40 Rs/Litre petrol. Purchasing bike was one of the biggest mistakes of my life(you must raise eye-brow asking for no. of BIGGEST mistakes I’ve made in 24 years and I would say Countless ;) :D ). Had I purchased computer, would’ve been productive for putting up grades and logical skills in programming to some other heights, which yet I attempted to raise by giving 5 hours in cyber café job along with 10 hours of NIT schedule. Strictly, I absolutely just couldn’t perform my duties well in my 5 hours job of cyber café ending up myself in Yahoo chats, porn and other useless surfing. Don’t laugh if I say - “Though by then I learnt how to switch on/off computers, how to clean them using wet rug, how to cheat putting money in pocket by unloging the customer before his time, how to reduce count of printing resulting 5 Rs/Page as black money and increase official salary of 1500 to greater than 2000 per month ;)

“Thief is not called Thief until he’s caught.” I even could not become smart thief as I was caught few times carrying unethical withdraw in night shifts and lastly i was way out of Cyber café when my Boss found new cheater named BHARAT. I can’t say if BHARAT conquered me in immoral withdrawals and stealing cash from counter, but who cares now? – I was back to home forever losing my first job of life :)

“Success lies in bouncing back when you hit hard at bottom, not in how high you climbed”– I was IN now. I lost 1st girl of life, 1st dream of life and 1st job of life but wasn’t ready for loosing B.TECH by then. I became sincere rather than serious about my B.Tech and started doing well in college. IN 4th semester - Never bunked single class and started sitting with some of the diligent mates, giving assignments on time, being well prepared for next classes and making out notes of every lecture. Recollected C and C++ concepts in 4th semester which I passed in 1st year somehow copying from Warrier Abhay(03BCE119) sitting just before jESS(03BCE120). Hard-work and positive thinking gives the way one wants if direction is correct. For the 1st time in NIT, I scored 7+ PPI and I knew now jESS is back :). Honest feel after a long long long time. I bounced back and now just needed to go on. I was nevertheless good at communication skills which conquered me IN Syntel Pvt. Ltd during campus interviews of 5th semester. Soon after 1.5 year, completed my B.Tech with first class which I never had imagined I would do :)

“Straight Roads never make good drivers” and “Only hard-work is not option of life” . I won’t mention much on efforts I put in Syntel for getting project and passing out Insurance with highest grades. Being topper in team of 10 mates in Assembly and top 5th in Mainframe Technologies in group of 30+ mates, road seemed straight once I got project but again.........

4th AUGUST, 2008(10 MONTHS AFTER JOINING SYNTEL)
I am sitting with HR Admin “Praveen Gandhe” talking about my termination and regretting on childish mistake I did in Syntel of misusing corporate Email ID. Honestly speaking- I was just a ONE COUNT for SYNTEL during recession lay offs. As I said “Hard-work is not only option of life”. I was out of Syntel with no countable experience searching for another job in recession which was akin to chew iron.....

23rd SEPTEMBER, 2008
Getting job with Mainframe background was impossible with 10 months of experience at time of recession. Since 4th august, for a month I tried every contact of my w910i phone book and result was NIL- No call for interview. Called up numerous consultancies but – all I get out of it was – BULLSHIT. Figuring out stumped in worst situation I cursed Praveen Gandhe loads of times. Finally one compromise.......

“To Win game of Chess, one has to take steps backward also”.I moved down my focus on Software Testing field even if I worked on Mainframe coding in Cobol and JCL. I put my all efforts in testing concepts and started giving interviews in Ahmedabad local companies rather looking for MNCs which lets u stand in interview with minimum 2 years of exp. I failed to clear testing interviews in some companies but never failed to get experience out of failures. In-fact I believed –“To fail is not bad but to stop looking for success is worst”. Failure is step of success – isn’t it? Lastly, after ~3 months of hardwork with all dedication I applied, on 22nd September, 2008 I got call from Chitra Sharma, HR of Coulera Technologies(now a days good friend) and I was informed for clearance of 4 rounds of interviews in testing including Aptitude test, technical written, Technical face to Face and HR interviews. Happy days back again!! Actual meaning of success I experienced in these 3 months, However Dream is poles apart from Success......

“Dream is not what you see while sleeping but it’s something that never let you asleep” – a well forwarded SMS which has travelled thousand times from NOKIAs to ERICSSONs to SAMSUNGs to all others. While forwarding, by no means one could take in the pure gist of priceless words spoken by Abdul Kalam – but I’ve been apprehending it since last year. I was given lowest appraisal despite handling the finest tasks of my job, which again was kind of injustice feel due to politics being played in almost all IT companies. “Worst gives u best if u can get” and so the worst appraisal in my life gave me strength to reopen closed door towards my dream. “jESS and Business” together – sounded good. Had already been looking for some way of getting own business which can make it worthless getting highest/lowest appraisal and all bullshit politics. Mine, but more precisely other’s lost dream revived when......

AKSHAR MEDICAL, BOPAL, APRIL’2010
jESS,Bhavin and Sanjay are 3 parteners for medical business that was initiated in APRIL, 2010. Every day I learn medical science that was lost after my 12th. It’s never been only business for me, but it’s been "Living My Dream" 4-5 hours everyday after software life of 9 hours. I don’t recall when I lastly slept well enough but if waking up keeps me feeling alive with dream - then why not? Atleast i DARE TO DREAM and live it.....

3 hrs of “Home-Office-Bopal-Home” Journey, 9 hrs of Software life and 4-5 hrs for my lost &revived dream gives summation of 17 hours. 1 hour for all other activities of regular life gives me final count of 6 hours to sleep. Abdul Kalam stands correct for his words … Doesn’t he?

Secret lies on 588….

25th Jan’ 2011, Bopal.
“Awesome…Oh my god” – I blurted out and heaved a sigh as I read the 3rd line from bottom of the page no. 588 on left (Those who are good catcher will always know that 588 page never comes on right:)).


~15 days back,
Having had incidental read of other exceedingly captivating works of Dan Browne namely Da Vinci Code, Deception Point and Digital Fortress, I couldn’t resist borrowing “The Lost Symbol” - latest of Dan Browne from Shruti. What I discern about was – at least I’ll make her buy of 299 Rs worth ;) :)

Reading has imparted big chunk of my years and this was another pulling off after a long time. The day I had book on my hand, I was agitated to again travel through journey of the matchless secrets and wisdom that must been depicted in the 600+ pages. Every chapter of Dan’s work starts with tangibly exceptional details of front ambiance entrance of chapter matter and ends with looking forward charm – I knew from past read.

My Words on The Lost Symbol
Absolutely, The Lost Symbol also begins with tongue-tied details of ritual parts and query-some methods where reader gets wrapped up with book right from the first paragraph. The day I commenced in morning, evening was completion of 29th chapter. I will say – As expected:). Every page of ”The Lost symbol” brings up informative gain, thrill, anticipations and needless to say - strong vocabulary exercise :)

Mediocre chapters of the book were around 40th to 60th – which is more about the involvement of new characters, past of characters, different experimental write ups and history on historical symbols (those who reads for knowledge may found eventually interesting). But nonetheless, it never looses the momentum while going on the way.

I affirmly don’t recall the exact chapter no. when Langdon and Kathrine gets involved in the symbolic journey together, but that’s when I evoke that speed of turning up and moving forward was at max ~2-3 Minutes/page. Breathless – I must mention from 60th onwards up to 120th chapter excluding 3-4 breakpoint chapters. The escape from attacks, decryption of symbols and codes, smart clarifications and revelations of each and every secrets unveiled initially etc, consumes reader totally IN - “Absorbed and engaged” every chapter by chapter. Besides, dark side elucidation is stupendous.

Normally Langdon – The lead character of the Dan mystically works on revealing secrets and keeps every reader engrossed in parallel with running time(which is true for this book also) – but this time It’s “Malakh” the Powerful villain of the story who wins the bowl in captivating you. The way he’s been scribbled though out the Journey – is awful. One can’t imagine “off-putting” character than him. Intensely - terrible, dreadful and villainous.

Heart of the Book
Starting from 120 to 133(the last chapter of the book) – covers the actual connotation and significance of the book. Worthless it is reading 1 to 120 chapters if you may not literally eat these 13 chapters forever with HAJMOLA digestion tablets. Simplistic wisdom of ages have been covered in last ~30-35 pages. I must mention- there was intense comparison and connection I could apply with my pre read “The Conversation with God”

Final Verdict
Knowledge: 10/10,
Thrill: 7.5/10,
Language: 8.5/10,
Overall Read: 8/10.

Good Read!

As I said smartest secret lies on page 588 but the fortunate readers will not want to miss the 587 pages before revelation. Will they?
I just returned the borrowed “The Lost Symbol” and now waiting for another master piece of Dan Brown :)

Adventurous Trip.....

27th November, 2010
Rachana( my Project Lead): jESS, should I tell u something? “You are the first person I’ve met who gets fun out of worst situations every time”.
jESS: Is that so?
Rachana: Yes, observed many times :) I never miss in my judgment FYI.

The complement which in-fact is fact that Rachana offered that noon in office was/ is the most likable complement so far in my life – being honest. It’s kinda been fun since long time (about 1.5 years) when something unexpected and unfavorable occurs to me and I still managed to motivationally and dramatically enjoy it.

13th January’2010, 6:00 PM@Patni Computers, GIDC-Gandhinagar.
“Swapnil, Would I set off half an hour early today? “ I requested to my TL for early leaving.
Swapnil: “U may run off 45 minutes early if u want, making sure of your PPS TCs are through.”
“:( :( :(” (how the hell can 6 PPS TCs be executed within 30 mins by any1 in entire PCS?) I din’t speak single word and got back.

I, by now was late when I watched out for watch, evading myself out of corner “Aqua” conference room and avoiding noticing act. Waved final ALVIDA to shruti and my FZ-16 was waiting to head off (Hardly miss to write about FZ…isn’t it?). What I knew was - 100Kmps won’t help but still had to strive for my best to reach ASAP. Reached home, packed bag and I was on the way to Deepen’s place. Came across traffic and reversed my FZ when I missed to hit to car or by car (I was doing Trinity Stunt of Matrix Reloaded infact ;) ). I was much sure what’s gonna go once I reach to Deepen’s place……

“We are already late you A**hole !!” heard from Deepen as expected.
“We’ll catch it Man :) ” he heard from me as expected.
That’s what differs me and Deepen – I am always Extra-confident of getting through and he’s always practical.
Even 10 minutes later, we kept rehearsing same words with same punctuation marks that we’d started with, the only difference was – “In the Auto heading towards PALADI bus stand”.
“I gotta tell you something very important” I tried to turn off focus as it was my fault being late even after promising the bargained time.
“Nothing you’ve got resembling to important talk even” (I know you since 2 years) he caught me as usual.
“Okay, if u already know, why to waste time for Zapping up each other ;) :D”
“You won’t change ever… Will u?”
“If we miss the bus, we’ll go on my FZ-16…no worries man, you are with jESS”
“That’s what worries me always…” said “D”

13th January’2010, 9:00 PM, PALDI Bus stand
Arrived at PALDI bus stop around 8:45 and could see the crowd eagerly and earnestly looking forward for bus to Surendranagar. One guy having decent moustache with slim body and rough wears, was guiding the crowd on the arrival of bus. With no prompt, Deepen reached to him and asked for next bus.
“2 last buses are there, 1st is coming within 15 minutes” Deepen got the reply.
“Cool…God saved me as usual” I thought, standing 20 meters away but could hear that guy as he was loud enough for all audience around. Was I really saved?....

I must say Deepen‘s got enormous network, wherever he goes his network follows.(Don’t compare him with Vodafone doggie ;) :D) He found 2 more friends who were also “Surendranagar ki paidaish” heading towards their hometown. They started with company work and career bullshits. Why these bullshiters always start with Company and work? Can’t they start with “How’s your sex life”? (it always amazes me that whoever meets, starts with “hows your company? What’s they are paying?’’ etc. jaise half salary uske naam karne vala ho….huhhhhh :P).
For time-pass, bought some peanuts and next 15 minutes we enjoyed it. Still no sign for the bus. Alas, I had to listen some more technicality of the product that deepen is working on in IMANY – honestly speaking MY BAD. Fuck off. Who cares? But acting on listening it with heavy interest is also fun ;) :D. I was fumbling (as usual) and other 2 semi technical friends of deepen were listening him. And out of the blue…unexpectedly…..talk halted. Reason was 100 meter away……..

“Thank Go…….” I stopped in between being grateful to god when I could see the bus with no. of passengers in it.
I recalled the Mumbai Locals – what a resemblance!! Surendranagar is profoundly Demanded – I dint know that :D
“I am not IN” I decided and thought of waiting for the next bus. But………….

Deepen said “Get in” as we’d already heard from ‘Single power double battery bus guide’ that it gonna be the last bus to Surendranagar. As it was night and he din’t feel like trusting my driving skills on FZ, he insisted to get in.
“This will be your memorable experience jESS !! What say? ” he taunted me.
“Yeah, I assume so. I’ve started giving thought on writing about it ;) :D”

13th January’2010, 9:30 PM: Get Set and Go
It’s pointless to mention about getting IN to those who’ve previously boarded Mumbai Locals. Wasn’t lesser than that.Capacity of bus was of ~20 People and ~30 people were already IN with their luggage. What to say? Looking at situation, those 2 semi technical guys (as they were listening deepen’s technical talk with precise interest but never responded technically) had also refused to ride on. As we’d made up mind, I literally had to fight to get IN. 3 stairs to get in and it took almost 60 seconds pushing others IN and OUT. But it’s fun pulling off something not easily achievable. Isn’t it?

Rough guy with heavy body, Dark complexion and ragged shirt with 2 buttons open, exhibiting his hairy chest had come out from the Bus and just made clear statement that “Need to go standing ” I never expected sitting position but what I wasn’t offered was decent standing position too . This gonna be terrible journey. Deepen also had got IN and was protecting our luggage– I’m sure he’d to struggle more as he’s three inch wider than me from every side :D ;). Somehow I managed to settle in, resting myself between 3 guys and 2 ladies around and I spotted 4-5 more passengers digging IN. “Ohhhh God….NO more Plssssss” I exclaimed.

I asked for the 1st time to Deepen “how long it takes to reach Surendranagar? :( :( :(”
“3 hours” he said with smile which he managed to have, not expressing pain hidden behind grinned face.
Luck was really tucking us hard if it exists and I thought it was our poor choice but not luck. 3 hours to go and situation was unbearable from the very first step itself. How will go 3 hours in the situation I was IN?

When new passenger who was Muslim guy with his beautiful wife and sweet baby boys came IN, I got in situation where I even did not have space to move my leg from one position to other. If I do so, I was hurting another lady sitting with her cute baby girl who was enjoying songs from Ericsson before bus started (dint observe the model but jingle was of first-rate). I must say that Lady Mom was also beautiful! Why mom is always so beautiful? :) She asked to stop playing her girl with mobile songs and I winked that baby to continue ;) In-fact I was at least enjoying the song which was from NEWYORK movie…..
Bus finally took off.
Just feel yourself between 5-6 people around and you have only space to breathe. I could smell the other people around me. I wont say “Yuck” but will say “It was the way it was”. Not everyone in the world gets perfume or Body-spray to start with the day  I coped up with no alter option. Bus driver who looked to me a big fan of Himesh Reshamiya, started song which somehow was fun listening it. I could hear the creaking sound of the bus from every corner of it giving funny background music to songs that were being played. I was tired out of the day wanting to sleep and still 3 hours were to go :( My one hand was hanging on the bar above to support myself against the push pissing of other passengers around. With other hand I was playing with W910i. None of 3 legs had chance to move ;) :D. It chanced me new try when I finally saw a guy performing 3 in 1: Standing + Hanging + Sleeping. How amazing it was!! “Is it possible?” - I thought. I had to give try before I don’t believe it and so I did. I copied him resting my skull on hanging hand, closed eye and tried to sleep but on ~120th second, I was struck by guy from behind and lost my balance as soon as slipped my hanging hand - Doooooom. I thought I could never do it and once again I watched that guy still enjoying sleep standing in bus. I did not have to lose hope – “I can sleep if he can” I thought. I tried again….and then I was awake when…………………….

13th January’2010, 10:30 PM: IDEA @Rajkamal Restaurant
I finally did it and slept for ~30-40 mins in the bus standing and hanging. I awaked when we reached BAGODARA. 10 minutes break for Tea and snack and then again I would go sleep in standing position. My legs were already jammed so I jumped down from bus to free them for some time; so was with Deepen. When we were having Masala Peanuts with Thumps up, suddenly Non-Technical mind clicked and flashed up with Amazzing IDEA and I asked to Deepen ……………

“Can’t we sit on the roof of the bus?”
Deepen amazed though loved the IDEA and said “Yes, but need to ask that Big Man”. Within 4 seconds I reached to Big Man and asked him if we can sit on the roof of the bus and with my biggest wonder he said “YES”.

Now I got my turn – now it’s my way- Now it’s my fun. From nowhere I got immense zeal to go on. Now, nobody can stop me out of my enjoyment. Thrill was I waiting for and this spark had put on the fire inside. No looking back what could be consequences and no why – what - where? I just had to do it and I will do it.

Got into bus to collect luggage and came out in no time and started climbing on the bus-roof without waiting for Deepen even. He followed me but till he was up on the roof, I already had settled my self. One more guy “Pratik” came up with Deepen and now we were 3-Idiots waiting for bus to start. Candidly - It was fun but not as easy as we thought of………………….

I knew we can’t sleep but had easy feeling than would have been inside the bus. Fresh, natural but chilled Air instead of sweating smell (and there are many other Air too as you guys know ;) :D) of passengers around. Now I can feel myself free. There is nothing greater sensation than of being free. Tiredness was nowhere in my body now and I dint want to sleep then. I wanted to just indulge and enjoy the journey – one in all time experience of journey. Bus started again and icy air was felt. We already were protected by shutting down ourselves with jacket and urban caps. Initially we sat straight in direction of bus facing the Highway to be breached on. But within 10 minutes, we realized true strength of winter and sat inverse; hence we could show our ASS to upcoming highway. We were not able to say HI to next junction points but were able to say Bye to all - the way we were seated. Frosty air was giving heavy blow and I was accepting it with highest joy of getting trembled. We had introductory part with Pratik and came to know he is consultant of jobs. I talked about my business rather than JOB and exchanged cards. Deepen never miss technical talk and initiated on his Java coaching part. We talked about lot of things starting from our business to other business people, 2011 Vibrant, Mahatma Temple and its capacity. We talked about marriage dates of Mit and Jinal(friend of Deepen). I suggested Deepen to buy him Condom as gift – Honeymoon pack and he liked the idea. Looking at open sky above, we talked about Universe, stars, moon etc running with us to Surendranagar. Stars and Moon were getting artistically reflected in rivers and ponds that came across the way to Surendranagar. Then as all tired out of talking for long I started singing songs. Some of them were “Aao Milo chale”, “Alvida….” etc. I and other two were humming them and enjoying my talent of “faltu timepass music”. On every curve of road junctions deepen used to tell me about the different locations on the way to SNAGAR. I too recalled my mom’s village where I’ve spend ample amount of time in childhood with most innocent NATU-MAMA. Had lot of memories sprinkling out of my mind starting from my childhood when “Neele gagan ke tale, Jungle ki aur chale(with hatho me Lota) ;) :D ” I recalled Raja-Rani pond where I used to go for poo stuff :D :D :D. I recalled the well from which I used to help my MAMI to get drinking water without using roller.
I recalled…….I recalled……..I recalled……………
Honestly speaking only missing part was: CHILLED BEAR for me and Thums up for Deepen.
After ~30 minutes at 12:10 AM, we are eating Papdi at Surendranagar bus-stand with coffee and Tea. Reached Deepen’s home with his brother (Rushabh) who came to pick us up. Hey Rushabh, whats up? ;) Hardly do I bow to my mom and I bowed to Auntie (infact not lesser than my mom for 2 days :) ) saying “Jay Jinendra”. Went for wash room and slept at 1:00 after little talk with Family. Now it hardly matter weather its Deepen’s or mine :)

I was not quite well for next day to be honest, but this had been an added life-time thrilling experience. Once again I did it……and hope to do such adventure again and again…….

I couldn’t perform well over “Deepen” on 14th Jan, but I will see him in next Uttrayan :D :D :D